How many times must I ask you to sit down?

I know you like your hair, and your snow white gown

Where the heck are you going?

For the past five days it’s been snowing

How are you ever going to get up the drive?

You’ll be lucky if you make it out alive

However, we have a flying snow shovel

It’ll get you up and away from our little hovel

You stand on the shovel and twist the handle

Now, you’re flying high, like a fireball from a Roman candle

The shovel is a sacred artifact

It’s been in the family since the Anti-Comintern pact

The pact was between Germany and Japan in 1936

The same year that Franklin D. Roosevelt invented pick up sticks

There was a lot going on in the world right then

But the shovel saved our lives over and over again

It flew us to Holland, England, and the USA

Too bad we’d get shot down if we flew over the US today

But, you can fly yourself out of here on the shovel today

Just stay close to the ground, look up, and take time to pray