My soul is as empty as a wishing well

I think my ankles are starting to swell

I look out the window and there’s a cow crapping on my lawn

By the time I get my gun it’s gone

Now I’m hungry for a triple cheese whopper and a bucket of fries

As I drive through the drive-through, out of the dumpster out back, I hear cries.

I try to place my order but the person in the dumpster is yelling too loud

So I take off for the fish place with the pirate on the roof wearing a black shroud

Suddenly I see

The dumpster person is running after me

Oh my God–it’s the former high school football star Bill Evan

He’s been down on his luck ever since ’77

I stop and let him almost catch up with me

Then I slam it in gear and drive away despite his plea

He was a bully in high school & I’ll never forget

Now, I can leave him to starve by the roadside with no regret