Surfin’ Bird

The time was right Finally, after 70 years I will dance all night! The nursing home has set up mini morgue out back To accommodate every fatal heart attack I’m ready to dance until I drop to the floor Once I’m gone, I won’t have to pay the bills anymore! This is my exit-this-world planning […]

Cat

I looked out in my yard and there were birds everywhere They are all equally ugly and I don’t care I have nine cats that I turn loose every morning before ten They stalk the birds again and again They go after a bird And the bird flies away Circles around, craps on their head […]

Dog

There was a time when I could move and run Now I can move, but not so much, and its no fun My dog is old and nearly dead My nose has turned bright red It drips all the time all over my shirt At least it’s quiet and it doesn’t hurt Drip, drip, drip […]

Sheep

Able-bodied big hard body Wearing canvas trainers; very shoddy Sweat pants from Salvation Army I think he’s wearing them just for me But inside my brain I cannot see a thing Although I hear beanstalks and begonias beginning to sing But they’re singing to the carpet stretched across my floor Through the dust and blood […]

Moo

I was always mumbling It was very humbling To have people asking me “What?” With a look on their face as if I was smoking pot I’d never gotten high in my life Except that one time in Costa Rica with my wife The dope down there is pretty powerful stuff I met La Segua after […]

Cat

The snow was melting The rain was pelting Once again it filled the ditch around my house I was glad I didn’t have to see another drowning mouse But there she was, whiskers barely above the surface Trying furiously to swim someplace She was wearing a little hat that was shiny and black Suddenly she […]

Lost and Found

I’m off kilter and stumbling around I think I’ll turn myself into the lost and found Maybe I’ll be found by serial killer Maybe I’ll be found by a corn flour miller I prefer the miller to the killer anyhow But I could be found by a serial killer miller right now Thinking that, I […]